Before I was a mom I was convinced that I was the busiest person in the world, now I can only LOL at the thought of me being “busy” back then! 3 years and 2 kids later (toddler and baby) I barely find time for myself. I have always been a type B personality, and if a type Z personality existed I would be it. Here are a few examples of how clueless and messy I can be:
- Forgets that Hanukkah has 8 days during my conversion exam (seriously, all the signs are there, 8 candles on the Menorah, countless of books, 5 years of studying, I even worked at the 92y Jewish center teaching Judaism to kids!) But I walk into the exam and tell 7 rabbis that Hanukkah has possibly 9 days (insert face slap)
- I had to teach myself to say hi to people using: “Hi, How are you?” instead of: “Nice to meet you” because I was constantly re-introducing myself to people I had met for years! Chances are if we don’t speak on a daily basis I probably forget your face and name.
- I’m that person who can’t have a car with automatic ignition. I can’t count how many times I have walked out of the car and left it on for an entire night/day.
- You’ll know if I walked into a kitchen or bathroom, I tend to forget where things are and open every drawer, forgetting then to close them, leaving ALL drawers open.
Anyways, I know something in my brain is not right, I’m probably missing a connection or who knows what. I make up for it with my loving personality, creativity and forgetfulness (great perk for my friends when they want to share a “chisme” and ask me not to tell anyone. Um hello! I already forgot what we were talking about!)
I had always been able to hide my “condition” behind good laughs with the people who know me the best, that was until I had my babies and my business became more official. One day, overwhelmed by the chaos, I kept asking H’: Send me a sign, tell me what I’m doing wrong, help me out! And suddenly after a special moment I realized I’m not doing anything wrong and I don’t need help. H’ is teaching me through my children something that I haven’t been able to get in years of therapy, books and classes: the gift of slowly become a little more organized and mindful. My children gave me a wonderful gift, I might be teaching them how to talk, eat and crawl but they are teaching me to be mindful, organized and maximize my time.
I must share my tips, so that if there’s another overwhelmed woman like me, she can take this as a sign that it’s never too late to put her shit together.
- Stick To A Schedule
My schedule is written in stone, and so is my kids’ schedule. I personally never cared about getting early to class or to anything for that matter. I stuck to my own schedule, dictated by where the wind was blowing and if I had drunk my coffee. But kids without a schedule are a recipe for disaster. Frida would wake up countless times at night, she would in turn wake Naomi up, then the next morning the whole family would wake up at 8:30am, Naomi always late to school, which in turn made me late to work… One night, my girls continued to be awake at 10:30pm, my husband was out on a business trip and I felt it was a crazy chaos. The girls needed to rest, and I needed time to myself. The next day I created a schedule. I swear we couldn’t be happier. The girls love the routine because they know what to expect, they are rested and are never late to school. After school we spend the day playing, and at night I’m finally catching up on this blog!!!
2. I’m slowly doing a technology detox
Technology is seriously making us into addicts. I decided that I needed to step away from my phone when A. I started to realized that the first thing I did in the morning was check my phone before saying hi to the people I love the most and B. when I started to receive requests from Naomi to use my phone. How could I say “no” to her if I had it on me constantly? My detox is: I Can check Instagram, and other social media twice a day. At home the phone stays inside my drawer until babies are asleep and then I can check it for 10 minutes. Exceptions are: When working on the apps and when I want to take pictures of the girls. The hardest has been to separate from the phone at night when everyone is asleep and I’m bored but too tired to read, but I promise I will make it happen!
3. I’m Starting To Dress Up Again
For 3 years I forgot about my personal image, I honestly didn’t care and wore sweatpants everywhere, even to work! I didn’t cut my hair or got a manicure for 7 months!!! I wanted to, but I just could never find the time always prioritizing my business or the girls. I realized I had become a total hot mess. I missed my old self who loved putting on makeup, dressing up, and who was always prim! Slowly I started a transformation. It was very easy to become a hot mess, not so easy to go back to my old good habits, but I’m getting there!
4. I’m slowly trying to become organized
Creating lists, schedules, and learning to put my shoes in the closet when I get home. I want my girls to be like their dad! organized and sharp. I don’t want Naomi to take off her shoes in the middle of the living room like I do! For that reason I’m constantly reminding myself to be organized always. Kids copy everything, so being mindful when I’m spending time with them also helps.
5. I have the intention to be more minimalistic
This one is the hardest because it takes time. Organizing my personal image made me realize that I had excess things surrounding us and the girls. So many things that we don’t need and that are filling up space. Part of being organized was magnifying space and I could only do that by getting rid of all the extra stuff that I don’t love or don’t use! This seems simple, but not so much when you have two kids, a business and so little time. The idea is to finish the bigger spaces by the end of December and the smaller things by January. And most importantly, but only what I truly love.
The biggest lesson of all this is that your best gifts and blessings come from the most unexpected (sometimes hardest) situations. My girls and the chaos that I felt during these months inspired me to become a more organized mindful person. I’m not there yet, but at least the intention is helping me slowly. Hope this inspires you to create a better you next year! Whether a type B, A or a Z like me, I hope you find inspiration to be the self that you want to be! Writing this with all my heart, a little tired but very inspired to start slowly getting back on track to be a better mom, a better wife and a better business owner, I send you all the good vibes!